I’ve been notably absent from updating this thing, I know, but there was a golden birthday celebration and PRIDE weekend that took me away from the computer for an extended period of time. I was planning on writing an update last night, but then I found out around 8 p.m. last night that my mother was in a serious car accident with a motorcyclist on Monday afternoon in Idaho. Physically she is okay and managed to walk away from the accident. She was wearing a seatbelt and the airbags in the Subaru she was driving deployed exactly like they should have. The motorcyclist was unfortunately not so lucky. He was not wearing a helmet, most likely driving at high speeds, and was pronounced dead at the hospital. The car was totaled and to say that my mother is shaken would be an understatement.
I’ve spent the past 12 hours on the phone with her and other family members and emailing back and forth with all of them. The police investigation is still pending (and after going through Idaho statutes concerning car accidents that result in death I’m confidant it should be ruled an accidental death), and we are waiting to hear on that. I went for a walk for about 30 minutes late last night to think, and the conclusion I came to seems to be the universal one throughout the family: I’m lucky that I did not receive a different phone call. With as worried as we are about my mother, I can’t imagine what the family of the motorcyclist is going through. Personally, it’s difficult to keep the “what if’s” out of my head where this has settled in the back of my mind. It’s disconcerting for life to be as it has always been one minute, and then learn the next minute that it could have been drastically altered. That kind of a narrow miss makes one stop and think. I don’t feel like there’s an answer to that, but it doesn’t stop me from thinking about it.
The only thing that I can comfortably rely on right now is that I’m lucky, and I’m not sure what to do with that right now.