First off, much shout out to my friends Anthony and Beth for the help yesterday. ‘Twas much appreciated, and I will repay in kind this Thursday!
That said, I don’t know if it was possible to hit any more traffic maladies yesterday during the move. I mean honestly, I never want to see another police barricade and/or street fair again. I won’t even talk about the far worse than rush hour traffic for no discernible reason. This is what we hit in order:
- First, we sat in traffic on 96th for probably 15-20 minutes trying to get over to the FDR in order to head south to the Brooklyn Bridge. This was a small window into what was to come.
- Then, we get “close” to the Brooklyn Bridge exit and waited somewhere around 45 minutes to an hour just to get onto the exit. In the meantime, there were tons of a-holes that decided they were too good to wait in line and would drive all the way up and then try to merge in. One asshat in a white SUV attempted to do this to me as I was getting onto the exit. I wouldn’t let him and stayed right on the tail of the car ahead of me to prevent him. He then rolled down his window to yell at me for not letting him cut in. He then accelerated forward to try it with the person in front of me, and what happened next was one of the few silver linings in the entire experience: the driver in front of me pulled left, I pulled right. Asshate in white SUV was effectively blocked from getting onto the exit. Us: 1. Mr. Asshat: 0. I eventually flipped him off when he ended up behind me.
- After crossing the Bridge, which took some time as well, we come to find that the directions I’d downloaded onto my iPod were somehow lost. Thankfully, I knew downtown Brooklyn after working there for nearly two years, so I went over to Court Street so Anthony could jump out at the Starbucks and re-download them.
- 5 minutes later, we’re back on the road only to find out that some gigantic street fair has effectively blocked off Atlantic Avenue and created, yep, you guess it: traffic. And loads of it. More minutes ticking by as we inch along. Police barricades everywhere.
- Using my knowledge of downtown Brooklyn street names, I tried to go on the side streets and we discovered one of the cross streets for my new address. We also saw the major train terminal in the area and somehow managed to make it to my place.
- Took about an hour to unload everything and get it up into my new place.
- Then, back on the road. Hit the traffic from the end of the street fair but finally managed to get to the BQE (I was not about to embark on another voyage over the Brooklyn Bridge). Once we got to the LI Expressway, it ceased to be “express” thanks to, yep, traffic. I’ve driven through rush hour before, and this whole day was FAR worse.
- Managed to drop Anthony and Beth off in Queens and hit the Queensboro Bridge, which went miraculously well given the precedent of the day. I jaunted over to the west side, hit yet another police barricade, backtracked, and dropped the van off. I’d picked it up at 2:00 pm, and by the time I dropped it off, it was 8:30pm. I believe we spent maybe 2 hours actually moving things and loading it into the van. The rest of the time was spent driving and in traffic jams.
As I walked back over to 7th avenue to take the train to my new home, I spotted a Taco Bell. You’d best believe I went right on in and ordered the meal with the 3 so-called tacos, and I very much inhaled them. Normally, I can never eat that 3rd one…not last night. No, last night I was famished. That morning Anthony and I had run blazing fast miles in the Continental Airlines Fifth Avenue Mile race, and running up and down 3 flights of stairs both moving out and moving in have combined to create some sore muscles for me today.
Clearly, I picked the worst day of the year to move. But screw you cosmic forces conspiring against me; I did it anyway.